Coping after a traumatic event

Take time out to get your normal amount of sleep, eat regularly and healthily, exercise, rest and relax.

Talking about your experience and how you are feeling can help. Also tell people what support you need. Bottling up your thoughts is often unhelpful. 

Keep your normal routine, but reduce outside demands on you and avoid taking on extra responsibilities for the time being. 

Accidents are more common after a traumatic or stressful event, take extra care.

Make the time to go over what happened in your mind when you are in a safe place. Don’t force yourself to do this if the feelings are too strong. 

Your thoughts and feelings about a traumatic event are normal reactions, don’t get embarrassed by or dismiss these.

Even if you were not directly involved up in the event, you may still be emotionally impacted by it and your feelings are valid - don’t dismiss them.

You might need help if you have been experiencing any of the reactions listed below for several weeks and things are not getting better. 

If you need help, contact your GP. If you feel you can’t wait find out about immediate support available. 

• Wanting to talk about what happened and feeling you don’t have anyone to speak to.
• Noticing that you are easily startled and agitated
• Experiencing vivid images of what you saw and having intense emotional reactions to them.
• Disturbed sleep, with disturbing thoughts stopping you from sleeping or dreams and nightmares.
• Experiencing overwhelming emotions that you feel unable to cope with or experience chances in mood for no obvious reason.
• Tiredness, loss of memory, rapid heartbeat, dizziness, shaking, aching muscles, feeling sick and diarrhoea, poor concentration, breathing difficulties or a choking feeling in your through and chest.
• Feeling emotionally numb
• Relationships are being impacted since the incident.
• Worried about your alcohol or drugs use since the incident.
• Your performance at work has suffered since the incident
• Someone close to you tells you they are concerned

• Nightmares.
• Memories or pictures of the event unexpectedly popping into their mind.
• Feeling as if it is actually happening again.
• Playing or drawing about the event time and time again.
• Not wanting to think or talk about the event.
• Avoiding anything that might remind them of the event.
• Getting angry or upset more easily.
• Not being able to concentrate.
• Not being able to sleep.
• Being more jumpy and being on the lookout for danger.
• Becoming more clingy with parents or carers.
• Physical complaints such as stomach aches or headaches.
• Temporarily losing abilities (e.g. feeding and toileting).
• Problems at school.

• Try to keep things as normal as possible: keeping to your usual routine and doing normal activities as much as you can, will help your child feel safer more quickly.

• Be available to talk to your child as and when they are ready. If it is difficult for you to do this, ask a trusted adult such as a family member or teacher to help.

• Try to help your child understand what has happened by giving a truthful explanation that is appropriate for their age. This may help reduce feelings of confusion, anger, sadness and fear. It can also help correct misunderstandings that might, for example, lead the child to feel that they are to blame. They can also help reassure the child that although bad things can happen, they don’t need to be scared all the time.

• In the event of a death, particularly a traumatic one, it can be difficult to accept the reality of what has happened. It is important to be patient, simple and honest in response to questions about a death. Some children, for example, will seem to accept a death but then repeatedly ask when that person is coming back. It is important to be patient and clear when dealing with these questions: for example, it is better to say “John has died” than “John has gone on a journey”.

Children experiencing PTSD might show that they think differently either about themselves or other people. They might:

• Blame themselves or show lowered self-esteem.

• Describe thinking that they are a bad person or talk about thoughts of deserving bad things to happen to them.

• Show less trust in other people and be less able to experience a sense of safety.

• Experience overwhelming feelings in the form of shame, sadness and fear.

• Avoid situations that they fear could increase their emotional response – i.e. might make them feel more frightened, threatened, ashamed or reminded of the event.

If you have any concerns about your child, it is important to seek help via your GP. There are some very effective treatments including Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) for children and young people experiencing the effects of trauma.